We don't value life- without knowing that there is certainty of death. Even with this certainty our valuation of life must also be reminded. Let be through the experiences of others, through films, through novels, or even just by witnessing an accident on the side of the road. We do not value people, if we do not remind ourselves that there is a chance of them leaving us- a way, another. We don't value time if we don't remind ourselves that the minutes in our lives are in fact numbered and inevitably limited. We do not value happiness if we never encountered or had the bitter taste of sorrow or the emptiness of remorse. Your values come to your senses like a bright light that emerges from total blackness when you realize that there is nothing you can ever take for granted. Like the minutes, and seconds in your life that are numbered everything in this world has a plausible opposite and a definite date of expiry.
Sometimes I wonder the purpose of life itself. You do not choose the family in which you'd be a newborn to, but you grow to learn of the strangers you come to call your mom, your dad, your sisters and your brother. We are all in fact strangers coexisting in this "immediate reality" under "these circumstances."What is the purpose in this life we're put in? What is the meaning when at the end of it all, through time, it may eventually account or add up to "nothing"? What is the importance of relationships when at the end of it all, you are born into this world alone and will die alone? I have no answers. But I do know that these relationships that we forge through different scenarios, may it be the family ties we build or even with strangers we meet in a bar, are fruitful bonds that would continually keep us company through this confusing journey we call "life."
I've recently been going to a few funerals this past year. And a question always pops up in my mind. How many people would be attending "my" funeral? Of course, I'd be lying cold, dead in the coffin by then, but it would be interesting to know. Perhaps the purpose of life is to live the life in a way that characterizes who you "are" so that you'd be living in the minds of those standing around your coffin. I've been to funerals of those who have lived- truly lived- though a short life, but a full life. A friend of mines had died earlier this year, it was an unfortunate and unexpected death. The beauty of his character and wonderful bonds he had forged during this course of his life was evident at his funeral. It was tragic to see him lie there with his eyes closed, lifeless and still. Yet he had lived fully and this was shown in the eyes of hundreds of people attending his funeral. Some even made their ways across the oceans and lands just to attend on such a sudden notice. The lives in which he touched resonated from the teary eyes of those who were there- and also those who could not make it. In the bitterness and unfairness of life itself, there was a beauty. A beauty in the meaning of friendships. A beauty in the power of love that was shown so evidently that very day. This is the ultimate reason of all reasons, this was why along his way through life, he was able to live it fully and to let the memories live on in the relationships- the friendships he had forged along the way with strangers who became family and friends. He didn't just "pass away" but through friends and family he is still alive in their memories - all because he lived a full and a beautiful life.
My grandmother's sister passed away earlier this month. She was in a semi-coma for almost twenty years. When she lived she was loved by friends and family. However, these twenty or so years, had erased most friends, past lovers, ex-husbands out of her reality. All she had left truly were her siblings that stood by her side, aided her through the truth in those words "thick and thin." When she lived, I believe she was a kind and gentle soul. But most of those - who turned up to her funeral were her family members. Nieces and nephews whom knew her for such a short time. Most of us, knew that this day was coming. It was bound to arrive one day another and we were in fact relieved that she was now in a better place. She was no longer just lying in bed, lifeless. She has been moved from the small hospital bed, to the bed of the sea. Back into the arms of mother nature as she had fallen asleep into a peaceful and long awaited bliss. This had me thinking once again. Two deaths, bound to me by relations. Yet one was so sudden, so immediate, so unexpected. It made me realize that the reason I did not cry at my grandma's sister's funeral was because through time I had expected it, and I had said my proper goodbye. But the immediate death of my friend. A young man who was supposed to have graduated, and started his career was not. From these few experiences I have shared, I have come up with a conclusion that every life and every death changes life in its own way. So whatever you do in life- though it may seem insignificant- for instance a hug to your baby sister, or a morning kiss to your father at breakfast, even though you still harbor the anger of him waking you up so early for breakfast- it is very important you do it anyway.
Death can hit us in every sort of way. With an illness that is detected, as unfair as it seems, there is still the gift of "time" that can console us, you may not feel it now but once you've grasped a grip of it, you'd sure feel lucky you have time to say goodbye to your loved ones that walked along your sides through this journey. But with an accident, an unexpected course of fate- one may say twisted fate, goodbyes are not said nor heard. It is okay to fight sometimes with those you love. It is inevitable. But I feel it is important- just so important- to let them know that you love them each and every day. Because you really do not know, if it'd be your last... Remember that tomorrow- and death is lying on a very thin thread. So make sure that those strangers you've come to call loved ones knows how you feel...
Bonne nuit from Bangkok..
Sometimes I wonder the purpose of life itself. You do not choose the family in which you'd be a newborn to, but you grow to learn of the strangers you come to call your mom, your dad, your sisters and your brother. We are all in fact strangers coexisting in this "immediate reality" under "these circumstances."What is the purpose in this life we're put in? What is the meaning when at the end of it all, through time, it may eventually account or add up to "nothing"? What is the importance of relationships when at the end of it all, you are born into this world alone and will die alone? I have no answers. But I do know that these relationships that we forge through different scenarios, may it be the family ties we build or even with strangers we meet in a bar, are fruitful bonds that would continually keep us company through this confusing journey we call "life."
I've recently been going to a few funerals this past year. And a question always pops up in my mind. How many people would be attending "my" funeral? Of course, I'd be lying cold, dead in the coffin by then, but it would be interesting to know. Perhaps the purpose of life is to live the life in a way that characterizes who you "are" so that you'd be living in the minds of those standing around your coffin. I've been to funerals of those who have lived- truly lived- though a short life, but a full life. A friend of mines had died earlier this year, it was an unfortunate and unexpected death. The beauty of his character and wonderful bonds he had forged during this course of his life was evident at his funeral. It was tragic to see him lie there with his eyes closed, lifeless and still. Yet he had lived fully and this was shown in the eyes of hundreds of people attending his funeral. Some even made their ways across the oceans and lands just to attend on such a sudden notice. The lives in which he touched resonated from the teary eyes of those who were there- and also those who could not make it. In the bitterness and unfairness of life itself, there was a beauty. A beauty in the meaning of friendships. A beauty in the power of love that was shown so evidently that very day. This is the ultimate reason of all reasons, this was why along his way through life, he was able to live it fully and to let the memories live on in the relationships- the friendships he had forged along the way with strangers who became family and friends. He didn't just "pass away" but through friends and family he is still alive in their memories - all because he lived a full and a beautiful life.
My grandmother's sister passed away earlier this month. She was in a semi-coma for almost twenty years. When she lived she was loved by friends and family. However, these twenty or so years, had erased most friends, past lovers, ex-husbands out of her reality. All she had left truly were her siblings that stood by her side, aided her through the truth in those words "thick and thin." When she lived, I believe she was a kind and gentle soul. But most of those - who turned up to her funeral were her family members. Nieces and nephews whom knew her for such a short time. Most of us, knew that this day was coming. It was bound to arrive one day another and we were in fact relieved that she was now in a better place. She was no longer just lying in bed, lifeless. She has been moved from the small hospital bed, to the bed of the sea. Back into the arms of mother nature as she had fallen asleep into a peaceful and long awaited bliss. This had me thinking once again. Two deaths, bound to me by relations. Yet one was so sudden, so immediate, so unexpected. It made me realize that the reason I did not cry at my grandma's sister's funeral was because through time I had expected it, and I had said my proper goodbye. But the immediate death of my friend. A young man who was supposed to have graduated, and started his career was not. From these few experiences I have shared, I have come up with a conclusion that every life and every death changes life in its own way. So whatever you do in life- though it may seem insignificant- for instance a hug to your baby sister, or a morning kiss to your father at breakfast, even though you still harbor the anger of him waking you up so early for breakfast- it is very important you do it anyway.
Death can hit us in every sort of way. With an illness that is detected, as unfair as it seems, there is still the gift of "time" that can console us, you may not feel it now but once you've grasped a grip of it, you'd sure feel lucky you have time to say goodbye to your loved ones that walked along your sides through this journey. But with an accident, an unexpected course of fate- one may say twisted fate, goodbyes are not said nor heard. It is okay to fight sometimes with those you love. It is inevitable. But I feel it is important- just so important- to let them know that you love them each and every day. Because you really do not know, if it'd be your last... Remember that tomorrow- and death is lying on a very thin thread. So make sure that those strangers you've come to call loved ones knows how you feel...
Bonne nuit from Bangkok..
